Are you ALL in?

These folks were incredibly ALL IN during my MORE Major Gifts workshop in Chicago. It was a GREAT experience with development professionals in all roles – experienced Dean and VPs of Advancement to brand new (3 days!) Major Gift Officer. They jumped ALL IN with focus and passion to strengthen their role in creating artful relationships with major givers. Thank you for trusting me to coach you.

Are YOU All IN?

In raising money, raising kids, raising others up – there are three kinds of partners – folks who are sort of with you (when it is convenient or beneficial for them), those who will if they have to and those who are ALL IN!
Titles don’t matter, bold or behind-the-scenes there is nothing of greater value and joy than the colleague, friend, spouse, parent, teacher, leader or boss who is ALL IN!

When you say, “I’m ALL IN!”

• you stay late to tie some little bow on 300 table favors for the event (or just fill in the blank with your story here),
• you drive 20 minutes out of the way to pick someone up,
• you show up (simply showing is often enough),
• you make it to wakes and funerals,
• you listen, really listen, and the conversation is safe with you,
• you resist making negative remarks about anyone or anything,
• you care, and care in a way that sometimes brings a heaviness to your heart,
• you feel the dreams, and the frustrations, of others  and
• you smile – often, especially when you don’t feel like it.

Great leaders are ALL IN!  And YOU have a hat labeled “great leader” in your wardrobe you can choose to wear. It is not defined by a title or a personality type. You can choose to be the leader of your life.

Leaders understand that leading is not easy. If you choose to be a leader, you create an expectation around how you show up each and every day and in every facet of your life. Others come to depend on you to lead. Your “leadership” hat is always on. Your attitude is contagious and you want yours to be worth catching.  You want to be the positive spark that lights up the days of those around you. This may be with a rousing, “You can do it!” encouragement, or the soft hand on the shoulder that says, “Good job. I appreciate you.”

Leading by being ALL IN requires developing structure and good habits. These include techniques to begin; practicing completing; triggers to render you silent before a harsh word is spoken; awareness of your physical state – tired, on fire, preoccupied, off a bit, solid; setting boundaries; and incorporating time for planning and being grateful. These structure and habit tools are important in the good times, sure – but life-saving in the bad. You see, ALL IN doesn’t always have an exclamation point. There are times when it simply means, “Tomorrow I will begin again.”

Being ALL IN celebrates authentically connecting with others. It thrives on passion but appreciates that passion can be a doubled-edged sword. As we take in the journeys of others we must not forget to find ways to release the weight of these acquisitions.

Being ALL IN is, of course, a mindset. It is an exceptionally powerful one because it inspires you to move from thinking and feeling to taking action.  And actions lead to results – major donor giving and engagement success, physical health and family time.

So if you’re looking at your fruit (your results) – number of givers, size of gifts, number of visits, total dollars raised, dinners with your family, number of visits to the gym, amount of planning time, days of vacation taken — whatever you are measuring, and you don’t like what you see – too small, poor color, not enough, spots and bugs – remember you need to look at the roots (thoughts and feelings) that grew this fruit. These are your results. ALL results come from the actions you take, or don’t take.  And your actions “grow” from your roots.  The roots are the inner game – your thoughts and feelings – that lead to the actions you take and the results you experience – your outer game.

You see, little tiny dreams or great big dreams BOTH move forward with little tiny steps. Weather you plant a tulip or a redwood, there is only so much water you can put on it to help it grow…but the result of the tiny action step of watering over time will be very different.

So dream big, get clear on what your big fruit looks like. Then, take the little tiny steps in the roots to achieve the results you want for composing a good world, loving your family and you. Finally, never forget my unrelenting belief in you and your ability to show up each day ALL IN!