Tag Archive for: marcy heim

Marcy’s More Major Gift Habits You Need

 

Every day you already live by habits. Some are intentional, like your morning coffee or your workout routine. Others happen almost without thinking—scrolling through your phone, feeding the cats, or wrangling little ones.

But here’s the question: What if you could build habits that directly grew your major gifts?

Think about it. Your results aren’t just about strategy or even about talent. They’re about the simple, repeatable actions you take every day.

And yes, some of your current habits may not be helping you inspire generosity. The great news? You can change them. Because here’s the truth about habits:

1. Bad habits don’t disappear—they get replaced. If you want to break a draining routine, you need to intentionally swap it out with something better.
2. Good habits are clear habits. You have to decide exactly what you want, or you’ll never know what to repeat.

So…. what’s are “good habits” for a development professional?
I call them Marcy’s More Major Gift Habits. Here’s a simple 30-day plan:

30-Day More Major Gift Habits

• Showcase Impact (2/month). Create moments where your donors see your mission in action—small tours, a student showcase, or a behind-the-scenes gathering.
• Coffee Talks (8/month). Personal check-ins, in person or over Zoom. Light, conversational, donor centered.
• Generosity Sparks (90/month = 3/day). This is the gold. Short, genuine touches—joy jolts – acts of caring.  Phone messages, quick texts, short notes—that simply say, “We’re thinking of you.” They are a mix of current donors, stewardship, new potential givers.
• Giving Conversations (5/month). Planned opportunities where you make an artful ask (hello, 3-sentence formula!).

Here’s the thing: Generosity Sparks are the most important habit. They plant seeds, deepen trust, create an experience (that may be just the good feel listening to your message) and set the stage for every comfortable giving conversation.

Every day you must start your day with them. Three touches before you dive into email or meetings. Imagine leaving this message:

“Good morning, Gladys! Marcy here, just calling to say hello and happy fall. We’ve started our youth programs for the season, and it’s wonderful to see young people back in action. Take good care—and thank you for caring about our work.”

That’s it. Thirty seconds. Done. And the ripple effect is enormous.

Texts and emails count too—but don’t overcomplicate them. The point is consistency. Three touches, every day. Yes, I am including weekends.  Repeat your core donors monthly and sprinkle in new names.

AND – this is very important – it’s 3 a day. You reset everyday regardless of the day before. The next day you start again with 3 a day. You don’t add more if you miss a day. You don’t stock up before vacation.

Will it feel overwhelming? Only if you let it. The cure for overwhelm is always the same: make a decision. Decide that you want to build this habit. Decide to stay in touch. Decide to invest in JOY through generosity. Decide to SPARK GENEROSITY!

Because the truth is, major giving success isn’t about one big gala or one big ask. It’s about the habits that make generosity grow—one touch at a time.

 

Invest in Joy™

 

You’ve heard me say it countless times…

“Invest in JOY!”

For me, it’s both a trademark and a song.

Why? Because you will experience unprecedented fundraising success when your goal is to help your givers invest in the gift that brings them JOY! They deserve to enjoy the giving.

And here’s the beautiful part: when you collaborate with them to find that special gift, their joy spills right back onto you.

Let’s Talk About Money (Yes… Money!)

I know—it’s still about money. But do you ever catch yourself feeling guilty about wanting it? Or resentful toward wealthy people?

Here’s my invitation: foster your relationship with money.

*Speak to it with kindness, gratitude, and respect.

*Express your intentions for its purposeful use—to create positive impact, support personal growth, and contribute to the well-being of others.

*See money as a tool to bring your purpose to life and live abundantly.

*Know that money is not inherently good or bad—it takes on the energy and intention you give it. When you think about money differently, it flows more freely… carrying joy with it.

 

“What if money always happens FOR you instead of TO you?”

That’s the question I asked in my keynote Inspire, Connect, SHINE ON! at the NAD Generosity Conference in Minnesota last week.

This was echoed in two wonderful sessions with Professor Russell James—Planned Giving expert, author, and educator—who reminded me that cash is only a part of wealth.

 

The Four Ways We Engage With Money

As Dr. James explained, over a lifetime we engage with money in four ways:

1. Binge with it – spend more and more (often leading to emptiness).
2. Bury it – save and save, fearful of running out.
3. Toil on – keep working and making more.
4. Enjoy it – find deeper meaning and purpose in its use.

We all cycle through these at different points. I’ll admit, I’m a “toiler”—I love my work, and I love making money! But Dr. James challenges us to enjoy it—going beyond stuff or stockpiling, toward creating something that outlasts us.

I like to say: Giving allows someone to turn their success into something significant.

 

Helping Givers Enjoy Their Wealth

Part of your role is helping donors separate money from wealth. THIS IS KEY!

Wealth includes appreciated assets—land, stock, property, collections—not just cash. And here’s the good news: you don’t have to be the expert; you just need to start the conversation.

 

Try questions like:

• “Have you ever given something other than cash to a cause important to you?”
• “Are you thinking about selling anything this year that’s worth more now than when you bought it?”

 

A “yes” sets up the next conversation—after you’ve gathered the right information and resources. That’s how the artful journey begins, matching timing, assets, and purpose for the greatest joy and impact.

So, yes—always be glad to take cash.

 

But remember, when you help your givers see all of their wealth as a resource for good, you help them enjoy the giving… and you both get to enjoy the living.

Invest in Joy™

 

“Anything worth doing, is worth doing well.”

I’m going to suggest that’s not such great advice.  Because, bluntly, you and I are probably not so hot at many things when we take our first crack at them.

Is it ok if you talked too much on your first visits with donors?

Is it ok if you lost your place the first time you gave a speech?

Is it ok if you whiffed a few times that first time you golfed?

 

Here’s the REAL story.

If you are not willing to write badly at first, you are never going to be a great writer.

If you are not willing to cook badly at first, you are never going to be a great chef.

If you are not willing to meet badly with prospective givers at first, you are never going to be a great fundraiser.

Let me paraphrase a message from one of my coaches, Gary Ryan Blair.

As you embark upon doing something new, your beliefs about how you will perform are 90% of your results.  How about adopting a mental approach that will provide you with the security, self-assurance and motivation you need to live outside your comfort zone, face your fears, initiate change, persevere through difficulty and to take on any challenge with the confidence of a mighty lion?

 

 The BEGINNING. MIDDLE. END. Model             

Every new task, project or goal that you jump into will be…hard at the beginning, messy in the middle, and easy at the end.

This sounds so simple, right?  You might encourage your colleague with phrases like, “You’re doing great! You’ll get it!”  Which in turn gives them the will to start, the strength to continue, and the sustaining power to overcome the greatest of obstacles and ultimately win.

It’s a mature, grown up “thinking model” and strategy used by all high achievers…

And it is the one most abused by those low achievers around you who look for reasons to make excuses, blame others and jump ship when the going gets tough.

Here are a couple of examples to prove this point.

RIDING A BIKE

In the beginning…riding a bike is hard.

In the middle…riding a bike is messy.

In the end…riding a bike is easy.

 

LEARNING TO SPEAK Marcy’s 3-SENTENCE ASK

In the beginning…learning to speak an ask is hard.

In the middle… learning to speak an ask is messy.

In the end…speaking an ask is easy!

 

Every new task, project or goal that you engage in will be…hard at the beginning, messy in the middle, and easy at the end.

Whatever your dream, goal or ambitions include you can rest assured “easy” is in your future.

So consider everything you have wanted to be, have and do, Make a list. Attack that list with everything you’ve got with the understanding that it is supposed to be hard and clumsy at the beginning…that it will be messy, dirty and stinky in the middle… and that when you finally do get to the other side…it will be easy and elegant at the end.

Anything worth doing is worth doing badly at first.

 

Your hopes, dreams and goals are waiting for you to show up, grow up and step up knowing you can have, do and be anything you want.  You’ve got this!

Invest in Joy™

 

 

Have You Ever Considered a Form to Be a Relational Tool?

What? Has Marcy flipped?

The Artful Asker is talking about forms being relational?

You know they’re simply used to record and define transactions, right?

Well… not so fast.

Yes, a form may technically be a tool to document intent, process a gift, or create an agreement. But when it’s created and shared artfully, it can also become part of the relationship journey. It can affirm your giver’s values, vision, and identity as someone who is generous and committed to your mission.

Forms can actually inspire giving, deepen trust, and invite clarity — if you treat them not just as paperwork, but as touchpoints.

Here are three of the most common information forms you will use in major gift fundraising:

 

1. The Major Gift Pledge Form

This one is usually very business-like: “I hereby pledge $X to be paid over Y years.”

But imagine if it instead began with:

“I/we are inspired to support the mission of [Organization Name] through this generous commitment because…”

Now we’ve made space for the giver’s motivation — their why. It’s not just an obligation, it’s a celebration.

You might also include:

• A checkbox for “I/we would enjoy periodic updates on the impact of this gift.”
• A note of thanks within the form: “We are honored by your confidence in us. Your belief in our work truly makes a difference.”

 

2. The Endowment Gift Agreement

This form often sets terms: how much, how the annual earnings will be process and distributed, lots of legal stuff, investment language.

But what if it also asked:

“What legacy do you hope this fund will carry forward?”  Or in agreement speak – “By making this the donors intend to leave a legacy of support for young people pursuing a veterinary degree – just as the donors received help during their degree years.”

Not only does that open a heartfelt conversation — it gives you insight into how to steward that donor, their family, and the fund itself for years to come.

You could even invite:

• A quote from the donor to share with future recipients.
• A name for the fund that reflects a personal value or loved one.

 

3. The Gift in Will (Bequest) Form

Bequest forms tend to be transactional, but they can affirm a profound decision. Try this language:

“Thank you for sharing that you’ve included [Organization Name] in your estate plans. You honor us by being part of your lasting legacy and we are deeply grateful.

And you might ask:

• “What inspired this decision?”
• “Would you like to remain anonymous or be recognized publicly?”
• “Would you like us to notify someone else of this gift in the future?”

 

What’s the Point?

In working with development professionals and the organizations they serve I will often see this sort of messaging on the website, in the cover letter or in a proposal – but then comes the form and WHACK! Could be an intake form for the hospital.  Sterile. To-the-point and maybe easier for the data entry folks to process – but certainly we have just pushed our donor out of their hearts and into their heads.  Why not intersperse some donor love?

 

These aren’t just documents. They’re moments. You can help your givers pause, reflect, listen, and affirm why there are making a gift to you in the first place. You can lift them up as they do this paperwork drudgery.

When you treat forms as part of your relationship work, not just your recordkeeping, you build deeper trust and lasting connection.

So yes…
Forms can be relational.
And no…
Marcy hasn’t flipped.

I’m just inviting you to see even the paperwork as part of the art of asking artfully.

Invest in Joy™

 

Do You HAVE to ASK?

 

“I didn’t even have to ask!”

You may have heard someone say this — and thought, “Wow! That’s great!”

You may have even seen this praised as a goal in fundraising.

But here’s the better question:

 

Is that really the best outcome for your donor and your organization?

(Warning: a little tough love ahead.)

Let’s unpack this. The key question is not whether you had to ask — it’s why didn’t you?

 

Four Possible Scenarios:

 

1. You were uncomfortable asking.
   If you’re honest, you intended to ask… but the words didn’t come. Your inner voice said, “It’s too much” or “It’s not the right time.” That’s fear — and it can lead to silence, or worse, nervous rambling.

 

2. You didn’t know exactly what to ask for.
   You understand the big picture of your organization’s needs, but you’re unclear about specific giving options to present. I call these your Vibrant Options for Giving (VOGs) — created by connecting your strategic plan and operating budget with the question:
   “What could be funded with private gifts?”
   This gives you a variety of meaningful opportunities to explore with each donor — aligning their comfort and interests with your mission.

 

3. Your donor was already eager and engaged.
   You’ve nurtured a strong, ongoing relationship. At some point, your conversation naturally turns to what they’d like to do this year. There’s no formal ask — it’s more about clarifying where their enthusiasm and interest lie.

 

4. Your donor always steps up for new projects.
   You know this giver well — she thrives on making an impact, now. She sees a need and acts, often generously (and usually six figures!).

In these four scenarios, the first two are red flags.
The answer? A clearly written 3-sentence Ask (grab the free worksheet here: marcyheim.com/askworksheet) — and practice!

Also, in scenario #2, your leadership may be contributing to the confusion by failing to define priorities clearly. You can’t make a confident ask if you don’t know what you’re raising money for.

 

We engage with strangers and invite them to become benefactors.

Yes, we are asking for money — but that’s only part of it.

The deeper truth is: we’re helping people give in a way that brings them joy.

The journey from stranger to benefactor is about discovering what inspires their generosity. You listen. You ask questions. You invite them to co-create the impact. You offer real experiences — a tour, a meeting with the CEO, and a chance to see the mission in action.

Some steps are universal. Others are unique. But all of them are intentional — designed to deepen the relationship between your donor and the good their giving makes possible.

And along the way? Clear, confident asks make it easy to say yes.

 

 You have a heart for our county fair.

You understand how generosity helps the fair thrive for the kids and community.

 

Would you consider meeting to explore ways giving to the fair would be meaningful for you?”

 

When the giving goal (your VOG!) is clearly defined, the ask becomes simple:

 

You’ve been helping provide an Academy experience for worthy students for years.
You understand that cost keeps some kids from experiencing our loving, Christian environment.

 

Would you consider a gift of $50,000 to establish the Smith Scholarship Endowment and support an Academy Worthy Student forever?”

 

Start with your best guess about what your donor might want to do.
Write the ask. Test it through experiences that show impact.

Spring is a great time to start planning your asks. By fall, you’ll have clarity.

 

In the meantime, enjoy the relationship. Stay curious. Test ideas. Writing the ask sets an intention — and that’s powerful.

 

So be bold. Stretch your thinking. And take action, even if it’s scary.

When you and your donor arrive together at the right gift, it’s worth the risk — the uncertainty — the slight missteps along the way.

Because in the end, it’s not about the money.
It’s about what the money does.

And when you help create that kind of impact — that kind of joy — for your donor and your mission?

Invest in Joy™